Lake Lugano and Lake Como

   So I thought my "research" into an appropriate “local dinner” experience might become very interesting given that I was in the Italian region of Switzerland! I had visions of Spaghetti Bolognese with slabs of holey Jarlsberg and biting Gruyere cheese on top or even a Minestrone soup served with shavings of Lindt and Toblerone chocolate! Some deeper investigations finally led me to a restaurant that is part of one of the oldest “grottos” on the lake (over 200years old) serving local specialties and accessible ONLY by boat – BINGO! Or as they say in Italian… umm….er…Bingo!

   “Grotto dei Pescatore” run by a lovely Swiss-Italian by the name of Augustino (who spoke zero English). His Italian was perfect of course but I had to have a quiet chuckle at his “staccato-ed” German he managed with some Germanic guests who arrived whilst I was there. It seems that even though 60% of the country speak Swiss-German as their first language, the remaining 40% don’t concentrate a lot on that part of their linguistic skills!

    A lovely little stone building literally set onto the side of the lake in what seems to be the middle of nowhere. Absolute solitude persists here with the interior of the “grotto” extremely cosy and welcoming. It’s certainly no 10-course Masterchef degustation here, this is simply honest hearty flavorsome Italian cooking meant to get you through the cold winter months. So I asked Augustino to simply bring me some local traditional dishes. Served up to me today was a simple anti-pasta plate of local salami, capocolla and prosciutto. Followed by a Caprese salad (mozzarella and tomatoes if you were wondering) I was already full! Washing that down with a local red then came the very traditional roast beef with polenta. The tastiest polenta I’ve ever had (and let’s face it, polenta can at times be pretty bland as it is often considered a “peasant dish” meant to simply fill stomachs when there’s not much else to eat!) After somehow finding room to finish it (it wasn’t through not enjoying it merely through being full already and not wanting to offend my wonderful host.) And THEN the homemade almond cake! Two belt-holes adjusted out and one more wine later I was ready to perform my new role as ballast for the return boat back to Lugano,a role I fulfilled perfectly!

Swiss/Italian border of the lake

 
LAKE COMO

   Now a standard tourist coach is around 3.8m in height (and the top 20cm-30cm of that is mainly the large air con unit running 1/4 the length of the coach – this is a VITAL piece of equipment that anyone who has travelled by coach in a European summer will agree with!) It’s not something you risk losing in a head-to-head with a bridge for instance because we all know which will win that head-on!(Though I’ve been on coaches where we’ve JUST “scraped”!!Even done the old , “Tour Director get’s out while the Coach Driver VERY slowly drives under said low-object and waits till the TD screams STOOOOOOOPPPPPPPAAAAAAA!!(That’s “stop” in Italian!) All going well you can often JUST get under a 3.7m bridge even if you are 3.8m and luck prevailing VERY occasionally even a 3.6m bridge – you want to have your Tattslotto tickets in that week though for that one!
 

View from Menaggio

So I was taking many notes during the 45min journey from Lugano to Menaggio on the western shores of Lake Como as the route contains many a 3.7m tunnel as well as tight turns through lake-side villages that were built pre-touring coach years. In fact I believe they might have been designed around the time that Jesus was playing full-back for Jerusalem(he wanted to play full-forward but that would have been a walk in the park (or on water!) so they put him in the rear quarter to even things up allegedly!)

Now you see Meaggio....

..and now you don't!

  Anyway, in a 4.5m long, 1.6m high Opel Corsa I was about to pose no threat to any object along the way (except for oncoming Italian scooters on MY side of the road!) so it was of course no problem and I found myself this quiet August Sunday morning in the sleepy yet cute village of Menaggio on the shores of Lago di Como. My “George Clooney GPS” turned on “High” I was ready to do some serious searching for this American “local” who has a lovely place on the southwestern leg of the lake in a town called Laglio. The serene “Domenica mattina“ however was about to be shattered by an amazing storm-front that changed the conditions quicker than Silvio Berlusconi could change anti-competizione laws in the Italian Telco industry for his own advantage!

The "wall of rain"!

  

Veranna

As quickly as it came it was gone and my car-ferry and I were on our way across the lake to pretty Veranna. Just a short 12-minute ride by ferry (or if the lady at the “biglettieri” (ticket office) informs you correctly you would actually get on the nicer passenger boat on the other side of the dock. Same same but NOT same! Grazie mille per NIENTE senora!)








   

Veranna

A nice place to get a REAL espresso and pastry at a pasticceria and walk along the waterfront and explore the few narrow and steep cobblestoned alleyways before jumping on the next boat leaving to the most famous village here – Bellagio.

Bellagio

    Again another 12minutes and one is on the shores of this fancy little village with many cafes, “gelati artiginale”(home-made gelati basically!), local shops selling all kinds of touristy (lets be kind!) paraphernalia. Same same but SAME! Still, even though much of the things being sold in the shops are the same as everywhere else it IS a very nice place with very pretty cobblestoned streets and some great REAL Italian deli’s that you rarely see back home anymore.

  

Bellagio

    







    With the sun deciding to re-appear after the mini-hurricane a couple of hours earlier it was time to jump on the 100yo plus paddle steamer to take the ride down the southwestern fork of the lake down to Como itself. (Como is shaped like an upside-down “Y” with Bellagio at its apex). Like my illustrious colleagues in the industry I’ve been privileged enough to be on many a boat ride before in many cities and places– Rhine valley, Lake Lucerne, Seine in Paris , London, Copenhagen, St Petersburg, Budapest and Prague river cruises, Yarra….hmmm, not quite the same but..! This one I had to admit was right up there even if my pre-conceived idea of sharing travel stories with George C. at his palazzino never came to pass! I was hoping to discuss the virtues of our Nespresso coffee machines and which were his favorite pods and other important things like that but no luck!

The closest I came to George!

   Many pretty Italian towns sliding past with the mountains hugging the skyline that had given way to the days earlier tempest. (Forgive me if I am beginning to wax lyrical as I am writing this from the Italian “Gulf of Poets” town of Portovenere, sitting in a waterside cocktail bar where one mojito and two vino bianco’s later my Mac seems to be typing all by itself! “Eh scusi senora, ancora uno vino bianco per favore”! I think soon I might revert back to my “Frencgermspanhungarglish”!) Anyway as we sailed passed Laglio there was no sign of Mr Clooney so one can only assume he was inside his palazzo making a coffee or trying to save the world from something as he tends to do in between finding stunning European girlfriends! The 2 hour journey ended in Como town itself which is a pretty place to sit back and enjoy a wine whilst watching the locals and tourists wander the pedestrianized streets of this former centre of lace-making.

 So a short 45 minute drive back to Lugano completed the round-trip of this gorgeous area. (Well, given I still had my car in Menaggio I actually caught the 45 min hydro-foil back up there and drove back along the coastline back to Como before continuing on to Lugano!Not a bad day!)

  Next stage, off to Milano, Portofino and ending up near the Cinque Terre in pretty Portovenere!Ce videamo doppo!